Below Deck's Kyle Stillie may have rocked the boat with several fellow crew members, but now he's ready to make things right.
In the wake of his drama with Fraser Olender — which ignited when Kyle joked in a group toast that he was surprised the chief stew did not get him fired for claiming (and later denying) that he'd hooked up with a charter guest — the deckhand feared that his days on St. David could still be numbered, after all.
As seen on Season 12, Episode 13, Rainbeau de Roos had already called out Kyle's multiple "self-destructive decisions," during the cast's night out in Sint Maarten. Plus, Damo Yorg declared in a confessional that he needed to "grow up," after putting their reputations and jobs at stake.
"I'm out. I'm done," Kyle vented to Chef Anthony Iracane. "Fraser doesn't even like me now."
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Kyle had another emotional moment while explaining to a producer how he felt "hurt and pissed off," adding, "And now f–kin' Fraser's pissed off at me. I've probably ruined the friendship there."
Before wiping tears from his eyes, he continued, "I feel very disappointed in myself."
Inside Kyle Stillie's apology to Fraser Olender
Elsewhere, Hugo Ortega pulled Fraser aside to address Kyle's behavior after Captain Kerry Titheradge decided to not fire him (but still instructed him to keep his distance from guests, moving forward.)
"Someone in my team is catastrophically spiraling into his own abyss," the bosun observed. "And I think you can see that."
Fraser, for his part, agreed, responding, "He's not himself 'cause he's been told by Captain that he can't assimilate with guests. But I know him. He's got an amazing heart. Tonight, he was an idiot, but I also know that there are other reasons for that."
Soon afterward, Fraser and Kyle had a heart-to-heart in the restaurant's lounge area.
"Sorry, by the way. I'm f–king sorry, man," Kyle apologized. "The idea of hurting you, the idea of being incorrect in how I'm saying things…"
That's when Fraser cut him off to say, "It happens," and the deckhand replied, "I know it does, but that's tearing me to pieces."
The conversation ended with Fraser calling him a "beautiful human being," to which Kyle responded, "I love you, man."
Even so, Fraser revealed in a producer interview that he intended to proceed with caution: "I don't know what Kyle's going through," he admitted. "I love the boy, but I will not be putting my neck on the line anymore for him."
Kyle Stillie opens up about his "self-destructive" behavior
The next morning, Kyle confessed to his mom during a video call that he'd "had a lot to drink" the night before, going on to say that the crew had been on his case about his alcohol consumption.
"Basically, you're drinking too much and saying stuff that you shouldn't be saying," Kyle's mom summarized, and he confirmed to be true.
Citing the "pressure" of his job, he told her, "I mean, it's my own fault. I am still self-destructive, I get that."
In a confessional, Kyle referenced his latest hookup with Solène Favreau, adding, "As much as my night ended great, I feel rough today. I'm definitely not happy with how I've been recently. I really thought I was better than this, but I'm not. So, I really do need to change."
